everyone is single if you try hard enough
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I have post one night stand depression
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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