Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I CAN MOONWALK!
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
