How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
she pinky promised me she was 18
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
