just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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