She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
