I am in a vortex of obligation.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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