now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
