only if we run a train.
done.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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