I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Randomize