Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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