he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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