Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
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