I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
