it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
