HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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