you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Randomize