it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
