I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
