it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
There r osticjed everywhere
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
