just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
