that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
