O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
