I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
