I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Randomize
