either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize