I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
