Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
