you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
her vagine was all disorganized.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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