Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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