Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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