Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
