NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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