i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Randomize
