We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize