i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
