how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
