I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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