oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
