tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
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