So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
