I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize
