JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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