sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Randomize
