Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
