Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
he just fucked me for my cheese..
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
