It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
