We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
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