i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize