oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
