IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
